If there’s one thing
I’m sure of in this life, it’s that I’m possibly the most impatient person on the planet. Combine that with my perfectionist, control-freak tendencies and you have the makings of a comedy that
would rival Laurel and Hardy. I want it perfect and I want it now and I can handle
all the details myself, thank you very much. See Sandy run. See Sandy run faster. See
Sandy splat into a brick wall.
Much to my chagrin, most
situations are slow cookers and not microwave-ready. Quick-fixes are the
staple of half-hour sitcoms, but rarely the stuff of real life, and in some situations, I do all I can and then I have to
wait… and wait… and wait because it’s out of my control. As
you’ve probably deduced, I don’t wait well. I figet and fuss and
pace and get frustrated, none of which are terribly productive. All of which
are draining emotionally and physically. It’s not the way God intends for
me to be.
In Isaiah 40:31 it says,
“But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings
and soar like eagles. They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t
lag behind.” (The Message) Waiting
is equated with resting and refreshing. Waiting is doing all I can do and trusting
God to work out the conclusions. Waiting is relinquishing control. Ouch.
The bottom line is this,
I’m wasting energy and time trying to control things God never intended for me to deal with. He knows I can’t do them, and yet I continue to bang my head up against the wall and wonder why I
feel sore and tired. I’m not the Chief Executive Officer of Planet Earth. Why am I assuming responsibility for things that I can’t control.
So here I am at the beginning
of a new year, and for the first time ever, my resolution is to gain wait instead of losing it!
© Sandra Perry 2005
